As faithful readers you know, every once in awhile, a topic just lays on my heart until I start writing. Today is one of those days, when my heart’s wide open and tears are in my eyes. So, I want to talk to you about bullying, because as you know, John Wright, our fearless leader, was bullied in school. Overcoming the group mentality is a huge part of his story.
Humans are funny creatures. We are mammals, and our biology is wired for being part of a group. This push toward group acceptance, in my view, is a throwback to times when there were deep survival issues for our species. Groups working together just survived better than individuals alone. On the other hand, our minds are totally free of boundaries. We can imagine whatever our heart desires. These visions are unique to each one of us. They mostly occur when we are alone, relaxed about timekeeping, and feeling connected. So, there is a push-pull between group mandates and the drive for unique expression.
It seems to me that the strong group imperative that encourages people to look like, speak like, act like, and buy like every other group member is no longer necessary and is an over-exaggeration of the drive for safety and security. Most Westerners’ lives are not in jeopardy. Few ever experience war, real hunger, homelessness, lack in any fashion. In fact, in the West we have the highest standard of living of anyone on the planet, and my theory is that the group imperative is just a marketing tool, used by organizations to encourage buy-in.
Unfortunately, with group buy-in, there is a cost. People stop critical thinking, tend to adopt the opinions, whether founded or unfounded of the group leadership, and stop asking intelligent questions. So, group members become very homogeneous and are easily replaceable. You’ve heard the story about your co-worker who died from a heart attack, and his replacement started working 15 minutes after he died, haven’t you?
Even though our country was founded by rugged individuals who prized freedom more than their lives, we’ve become a nation of people who judge others as either being in or out of group norms. That’s why I feel bullying is so easy. It starts out small. One of the insiders looks at a new student and says to a friend, “Wow, doesn’t she know that we don’t wear that kind of shirt here?” They both walk away laughing instead of welcoming someone who could very well bring a richer experience into play. That laughter multiplied by a dozen people who decide to make fun of the same girl online, over a period of months, could lead to her suicide.
Even more poignant, it’s the star gazers, the imagineers, the out of the box thinkers who bring evolutionary change to our world, if they have strong enough advocacy for their uniqueness. So, we invite you to visit some of these anti-bullying advocacy groups and lend your support:
And, please know that a small group of unique individuals, willing to accept and allow each other, can create a miraculous, joyful work place like we’ve done at Bee Wild.
We would like to thank http://www.nationalbullyinghelpline.co.uk/kids.htm for letting us borrow their poignant photograph.
With love from QueenBee
